Saturday, February 25, 2012

Musical Transportation

Music has this amazing ability to transport us back in time... sideways... upside down... inside out... to whereever we were when we first heard a song... wherever we were when something special happened in our lives... we are magically airlifted in the musical time machine!  Last night's re-opening of KISN radio really shook us up and down and all over the place!  It was a party to remember forever.  Facebook went crazy and we were all together in a big room dancing and chatting, as each song transported us...

Another Park Another Sunday... BAM!  I am in the car with high school chums, future college roommates, Denise, Elaine and Karen... driving from Portland to Rexburg, Idaho in my parent's 4-on the floor automatic "Renault" (we pronounced it Re-NALT back then) with ONE 8-track tape:  The Doobie Brothers!  Just took one line and I was in that car again - laughing and singing and dreaming of our futures and Ricks College...

Dream a Little Dream of Me... BAM!  I am in the car with Reed Card, my first steady boyfriend.  I am 15... we are in my driveway after our date... the porch light has been blinking a few times (signal from parental units that it's time to come in).  He finally puts his arm around my shoulders and leans in for our FIRST KISS... my first real kiss... the one that you never forget...  while Mamma Cass serenaded...say nighty night and kiss me... just hold me tight and tell me you'll miss me... I had to walk around the block twice before my knees stopped shaking...

Money for Nothing... BAM!  I'm cruisin' Broadway with my cousin, in my newlywed husband's bright red 4x4 Ford Ranger.  Cassette deck blaring at the top of the decibel level... and the speakers blew!  I don't know when I've laughed so hard.  It was the first time we had spent a week together "sisters" instead of  "big cousin-little cousin"... and it is a memory I cherish.  I can't hear that song without being in that truck... at that moment... with Melinda...

How about those family car trips?  We've all been there... dad barking that "driver gets to control the radio"...  which often meant the dreaded news station (even with a disc jockey father!)... but sometimes... sometimes... kids ruled (or at least he let us think we did).  There is someone, Walking Behind You... BAM!  I'm driving to the beach with my family.  Denise is spending the summer with us and we are in the back of our Mercury Montego Convertible... sun up... top down... Matt, Denise, Feather, TV and I all packed in the back... mom and dad in front... Dad and Denise are singing at the top of their lungs TURN AROUND... LOOK AT ME!  What a moment... were they more special because we didn't have "repeat" buttons?

Crocodile Rock.... BAM!  I'm dancing with Tom....
I Need you...... BAM!  I'm with Todd...
You're still the one.... BAM!  Greg...  
Hanky Panky... BAM!  I'm in 6th grade hoping the bottle will point to Brad...

And the list of BAMS! goes on and on and on... 

Then of course... there is PUFF the Magic Dragon - dad's theme song... but more importantly, the one he sang when he visited the sick kids... kids with leukemia, whose dying wish was to meet my father and Feather... who would lay his nose alongside their bed, while daddy sang PUFF to them... I didn't realize at the time how that would affect me forever... the BAM is more soft... sweet... meaningful...

And now many songs have double meanings:  we have our own youthful memories, and we watch, as our kids hear the same music (original or remake) and layer upon layer form their own musical time machines!  Music surrounds us every step of the way... cheering us on... crying with us... making us feel young again!  When DJ Dave made a little dedication to dad tonight... BAM!  I was a little girl again... and saw a silly grin come over my father's face, as he cranked up the volume and twirled me around the living room...
THANK YOU KISN!
and THANKS to dear friend Jeff Davis @ Our Production Studio for the sound byte!
Close your eyes and teleport back to 1966... where were YOU when you heard this song?







Friday, February 24, 2012

KISN RETURNS!

KISN Radio returns to the internet airwaves tonight!
Full of silly oldies... commercials... and old clips of classic DJ fun!  
Dad (Addie Bobkins) had a short but eventful stint with them from '62 - '64
From noon to 3:00 pm daily he KIS'D his fans before heading to KPTV for his live TV show...


Even listening to the test phase is giving me goose bumps!
 SUCH GREAT MEMORIES


Thanks to Gino Rossi - we have some classic moments captured on film!
Addie and Feather in the KISN window

Feather is the fifth Beatle!

I have his box of 45's around here somewhere...


Here's to you dad... a great birthday present!
I know you are on my shoulder listening... laughing... and dancing
Enjoy the fun... I'll be cracking open the virtual champagne with you all!

In the Arms of an Angel

Sometimes I need to be brought back to reality.  
With Dad's birthday this month... and Carly's... and the anniversary of his death... 
and IRS reports due for clients... and a fever invading my body... 
I already felt completely out of sorts.  
Then we found out that money owed us, has been misappropriated.
I felt angry and slighted... materialism was overtaking my need for a calm spirit... 
which is my goal in "Finding Deborahrah"... seeking the calm... feeling the calm... BEING calm...

I called my baby sister... just hearing her voice soothed me.
She helped me realized that I was getting a little crazed - brought me back to reality.
She reminded me to breathe and her best advice:  "Have a cup of tea!"

This calmed my soul... and I no longer care about money problems... 
the greed of others will 'KARMA-lize" them...KARMA-lize - isn't that a fun term!...  
But as for me and my house... we will seek peace and calm and happiness... 
and money can't bring that in the long run, can it?  
Oh, it can pay the bills and in that sense, bring calm... but in the long run...

A father's hug is another thing.  A father's hug brings ultimate calm.
As a little girl, it helped my boo boo's feel better.
As a teenager, it made me feel beautiful when teenage boys were cruel. 
As an adult, it reminded me that nothing else really matters...

Recently, a dear friend sent me a beautiful photo...
and with a little merging, it looks almost exactly like the one of my father and I
the last time I saw him... he was gone two months later.


When I close my eyes I can feel my father's arms around me... 
like I am in the Arms of an Angel... and nothing else matters.
If my earthly father's arms bring me such joy... well... I can't imagine the JOY TO COME!


Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Carly's Golden Star Birthday!

On this day, 22 years ago... a STAR was born... literally and figuratively... 
my youngest daughter, Carly Simone.  

This is her "STAR" birthday... for she is 22 on the 22nd! 
It also would have been my father's 80th Birthday!
They had so much fun sharing birthday cakes together...
he also shared his love of the theater with her,
and made her promise to never give up on her dream!

My dad told me I would deliver on his birthday, and although I wasn't due for another week,
just like her older sister, as if on cue, she listened to Director Grampa Bob, and came early...

We knew she would be "Carly" but couldn't think of a fitting middle name
to honor my husband's French Canadian heritage. 
My grandmother thought Bobbette would be fun - after dad (ugh).
My husband's mother wanted Cheri (meaning "my little love")... but nothing felt right.  
We weren't worried too much... names always work out... especially after you see your baby.  
Well she came in a blaze of glory - crash coursed her way into this world in less than three hours... 
full of dark hair... and a beautiful olive complexion...
(turned out to be jaundice, but who cares, she was TAN)...  
We cracked open our favorite almond champagne to celebrate her arrival,
staring at our French beauty, contemplating the fate of her middle name...
Hubby simply and quietly said, "Simone" - Perfect.   
Ten minutes went by before I made the connection.
Wait a minute - we can't name our daughter directly after Carly Simon!!  
He was giggling like he'd just pulled off America's Funniest Prank!
We decided if the nurses didn't "get it" and give us a bad time, then Simone was IT!  
They didn't, so we did...

She has been a joy... always smiling and laughing, with a flair for the dramatic.
She thought she WAS Annie!

She is artistic...

Loves animals...


Trusts her older sister unconditionally...

She is helpful...

Adventurous...

Definitely daddy's little girl...

She shares a passion of ballet with her grandmother...

Loves to dress up... another thing she and her Grandma GG share...

But her giggle... that is the best thing... she is still always smiling... always laughing...

And still trusts her older sister unconditionally... to lean on... to share secrets... 
and to capture her best photo!

Happy Birthday Sweetheart!
You are definitely a STAR - today and ALWAYS!

Woo Hoo - I made my first video - I might have another new addiction!



Friday, February 17, 2012

God Speed John Glenn

50 years ago... glued to our television sets... 
the whole country joined together in wishing our hero a safe trip around the world.
Our hearts pounded as it took off.
We crossed our fingers and said a prayer... and dreamed of becoming astronauts...
God Speed, John Glenn...


My heart pounds again to see he is still going strong at 90!
Must be something up there... in the stars...


Thanks to Stumptown Blogger for reminding me of this momentous occasion.
I knew it was huge, because daddy was home watching it with us.  
He didn't do that for just anything.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Finding my Crochet Hook!

In my search to "Find Deborahrah" I am ridding myself of old habits, and embracing new ones... 
or better yet, remembering things I used to love to do...  like CROCHETING!
Grammy taught me when I was five years old, maybe to keep me quiet during her soap operas!
I would crochet for hours... chaining forever, then stitching it into circles for Barbie rugs.
I never ventured into more than afghans, but that was my gift of choice.
For some reason, after my second child was born, I stopped.
Didn't realize how much I missed it until this year.

I couldn't find my old hooks (of course) so I splurged on a whole new set of them.
So pretty and shiny... blue... rose... gold... purple... red... F, G, H, J, K...

Crochet Hooks
http://www.flickr.com/photos/obajoo/3442936401/
 I had forgotten how obsessed I could become.  Totally obsessed.  
But if you have to have an addiction, this is a safe one, right?  
(Does anyone else hide their yarn purchases from their husbands?)

And thank goodness for Pinterest - when I find a project I want to try - I PIN it!
I no longer forget what I wanted to work on - it's all there on my 
I already feel much more organized, and some things are actually coming to fruition!

Today I finished some hot pads for a friend on my Facebook Page.  
We promised to send something "handmade" to five people.  
She has red in her kitchen, so I hope these will do!  
It is a pattern my grandmother used to make.  I never learned how before she died, 
and have been trying and trying to figure it out... then along came Pinterest and WOO HOO!  
I'm so excited to finish these - and can't wait to make a ton more for myself! 
I made them a little larger than a pot holder (9 x 9) 
big enough to put on the counter under a hot baking dish.
Would that be a Trivet?
You can make a little loop to hang them, but I chose not to...
Cotton Yarn is the best for this project... I used Sugar and Cream brand.
Thank you Kathleen - for the the best, most easily understood photos and instructions!

 Then I found some instructions for making beanies and can't make enough of them!
They are fast and easy and everyone loves them.  Hard to keep up with the requests!
Still working on different sizes and lengths, but they are so much fun to whip up.
I am partial to the half double crochet stitch... I should probably branch out.


I made some afghans for Xmas... Cardinal Red for my husband, deep purple for my stepmom...
but my favorite project this month is a blanket for the first granddaughter of a dear friend of mine.
When she said the room was "Linen with accents of Rhubarb" this seemed perfect!  
Lions Brand Homespun "Parfait" - and it went on sale a few weeks ago - good timing!

I love the way this yarn feels!  It is a little crazy to work with at first... 
and it sheds a little, which worries me a little with a baby... 
and I would never use it if I had to count my stitches, because your stitches are hard to see...  
But it is perfect for this pattern!  
It is so soft and lovely I can hardly wait to finish it for the shower!


Love the way the variegated colors are creating their own colored rows...
This is my favorite "signature" stitch.  I learned it years ago in the lunchroom at ADP.
For some reason I hate crocheting row after row of the same stitch,
but this pattern I could make forever... and I have... and will continue to do so!
I'm in yarn Heaven - I'm such a geek...

Oh and by the way... I found my old crochet hook!



I Heart Ballet


Ballet.  You either hate it, or you love it, or it is in your blood and you have no choice.  I belong to the latter.  My mother was a ballet student... teacher... lover...   She had the chance to join the San Francisco Ballet Company or marry the love of her life, Bob Adkins, my father.  Surprisingly she chose love - must be a generational thing.  Don't know if she ever regretted her decision - that's another post altogether.  She kept dancing after getting married, after my birth, and the birth of my little brother and for years after that.  She would scope out the new teachers in town, just for fun.  I would tag along, often dropping into a heap on the ground, not able to continue after a grueling barre workout.  She was the Ballet Energizer Bunny!  Even in her late 60's, visiting me in Arizona, she came to my adult ballet class with me, blowing my peers out of the water.  Her grace... regal stance... her elegance at all times... 

Here she is in 1952.. at the age of 18... I also found this costume in her closet after she died!  It is a lovely sage green color... handmade by her of course... about an 18" waistline.  It hangs in her honor in my closet... along with her lovely worn pointe shoes.  Presenting the lovely Meta Joanne Stout - who became Joanne Adkins... and eventually Joanne Magill... my beautiful mother.



She followed my father around the country, while he chased his dreams of becoming famous.  Sometime we were wealthy, sometimes (most of the time) we were broke.  She taught for local park bureaus wherever we lived, wanting to help those children who couldn't afford to go to the fancier studios.  I was incredibly lucky to receive a scholarship from Portland's beloved Jacqueline Schumacher, Portland's strict Russian style Ballet teacher, whose studio was at the top floor of the Odd Fellows Building in Portland, Oregon.  My parents met "Jackie" when she was the choreographer at the Portland Civic Theater, where they were regular performers.  Mom didn't drive, so we took the bus downtown, then walked up the six flights of marble stairs to that glorious studio, with huge mirrors on one wall, and a large Grande Piano in the front corner.  The live pianist (always live) pounded out Chopin Etudes as we sweated to the crack of Jackie's cane on the floor... keeping time... tapping us gently when our chins would fall, or our rumps were not tucked under enough!

She never bragged about her past... I never knew that she portrayed Odette, in the first ever production of Swan Lake in the United States!  She said the "white Russians" sent her a single red rose before each performance (Ballet West Blog)... it gives me chills to realize who I studied under!  I'm honored by her talent and her humility... her beauty and grace... and the fact that she is still going strong at the age of 90.  This was taken in 2008, when she was just a youngster of 86 - look at her!  


I love Maria Grandy's quote about the two teachers my mother studied under:  "From Mr. Vasilieff came movement, flow, Russian panache.  Mrs. Schumacher provided careful technical training - the fine details and nuance."  (Maria Grandy Article)  Russian panache - what a great phrase... and Jackie certainly did teach the fine details.  We never got away with anything.  I am unable to find photos of her teaching in her studio... another testimony to her humility.  She taught for the love of dance, and not for glory and fame.

I started dancing in my playpen, in the corner of mom's classes.  She said eventually I just climbed out and joined in.  Searching my archives, I only found one photo of me in a dancing pose at the age of 9.  How different our pictorial lives are now!  Even though Morton's Neuroma and other issues prevent me from taking class, ballet will forever be in my heart and soul... Thanks Mom!


Even though I can't dance anymore... my heart soars when I PIN!
   The Ballet

Thursday, February 09, 2012

Please don't send me flowers...


Valentine's Day is coming.   I have always hated that day.  
Love me EVERY day... ANY day... all year long. 

Why wait until my Birthday, Mother's Day, 
or this Hallmark Day in February to show me you care?
 It is contrived and trite.

Flowers die.  I have no place to display them.  They are a total waste of money.
 And yet... 
When the doorbell rings, and I see the delivery man standing there…
 I cry.
But maybe... just for grins... send them on February 13th... 



PS - the doorbell rang today... 2/14/12... it was for my daughter.
I got a hug - it's all good...

Thursday, February 02, 2012

Missing daddy...

I miss daddy every day.  I miss his daily emails with a long story, or a short "boogaloo!"  

This month, we think of him a little more.  
He died on February 2nd (2005) and was born on February 22 (1932).  

This photo was the last time we saw him, Thanksgiving 2004.  
It seems as if he knew something was wrong. 
 He was having pains that were attributed to "pulling a muscle at the chiropractor."  
The pains got worse.  When he got home to Oregon, on December 2nd the doctor announced, 
"Oops - I guess it isn't a pulled muscle after all.
You have Melanoma and it has spread to your bones.  Get your affairs in order." 

He was gone exactly two months later. 

My youngest daughter shares her birthday with him... 
we try not to focus on his death, but on his crazy, wonderful life, and the laughter he brought to us all!  

He was Addie Bobkins to everyone else, but my kids only knew him as "Grampa Bob."


We often wonder why things happen in our lives.  
Sometimes we get our answer sooner... sometimes later... sometimes never.  
This is one example of sooner!

Dad was desperate to come meet his first great-granddaughter, 
and that was the reason for the Thanksgiving visit!

I wondered why... and then I knew.
If she had not been born at that time, we may not have seen my father before he died.  
I will forever be grateful for the "grand plan" that brought Jocelyn into our lives...
at that perfect moment in time...


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