Thursday, April 26, 2012

No Regrets

I was thinking about Phoebe Snow today... and how much her music still influences my soul.
Today is the anniversary of her untimely death.
REST IN PEACE dear Phoebe... 

NO REGRETS... a catch phrase of late... 
How many of us can honestly say, "I HAVE NO REGRETS?"  What exactly is regret?  Guilt?  Pining for what might have been?  We can't go back, we can only go forward... I know I know I know... But how do we avoid regretting what was... what might have been?  What is the secret to  moving forward with no regrets?  Addiction groups preach living "One Day at a Time"... religions teach the Miracle of Forgiveness... and I believe with all my heart that we can be forgiven... but there are still ping pong naggers bouncing around in my brain... will they always be there?   How DO you learn to live without regret?  
Google that - you will find 3,400,000 sites about it!

The Fairy Shop
Women on the Fence Blog says "Mistakes are stepping stones.  It's not bullshit, it's true."  It IS true... what happened in my past has shaped and molded me into the woman I am today.  That sounds so cliche... but like she said, it is NOT bullshit... it just takes time to realize it... like 50 years!   Dating all the unstable men created a desire to seek out Marcel... a stable, teasingly stick-in-the-mud sort of guy... but I gravitated toward that because of experiences I had with other men...  

I DO NOT REGRET my marriage... I have two beautiful daughters and two loving stepsons... 
I would NOT want a do-over on the big stuff.... 

How to Live your Life with No Regrets, by Phylameana Desy  discusses regret like repentance:  Acknowledge the mistake...make amends... don't do it again.  Let me repeat that:  DON'T DO IT AGAIN.  Just Don't.

One thing really jumped out at me:

Do-overs - 
"Sometimes feelings of regret arise not from our past actions, but from our NON-actions."  

Do I regret my actions, or mourn lost opportunities?

Happy Heart Card Gallery
  • To live in New York - Perform on Broadway
  • To backpack through Europe
  • To work for Bob Packwood in Washington D.C. 
  • I was chicken
  • I used my Europe money for college
  • I found work at home in Portland
  • I had gone to New York... 
  • I had gone to Europe... 
  • I had taken the job in D.C.  

There.  I said it.
I wish... the dreaded shoulda-coulda-woulda...
But I don't know if I REGRET staying safe at home... 
And what might I have missed?  My father running for office... my little brother's graduation... my college experience... my parents' divorce... my first big love.  I like to think that even taking a leap on some of those opportunities, may have led me to exactly where I am today... I may have taken a different path to get here, but would have ended up on the same landing pad...
In other words... all roads lead home.

So let me switch gears and remember what I DID do with my wonderful life!


I DID portray "Ado Annie" in a local Portland production of Oklahoma... 
I DID  have some fun in Dinner Theater productions.  
What was the name of that crazy place?  The Jasmine Tree!
That's not a dirty old man with the bug-eyes... that's my daddy!
  • I DID get a job at ADP where I learned how to do a MANUAL weekly payroll for 600 employees - and met my best friend!  That led to another Accounting job with NERCO... where I met my future husband.  Now I do payroll on Quickbooks for several clients, and am able to work from home.  
Thank you 
  • I DID travel a little around the country and Canada with my husband, who traveled a lot for work.  Miami Beach, St. Louis, Dallas, Chicago, San Francisco... Victoria... Montreal...                          and Hawaii on our honeymoon... no shots required!
Honeymoon in Hawaii
San Francisco Trip

And look what I have... two boys... two girls... juuuuust right...

Be grateful - "The most valuable lessons learned in life often come from the mistakes we make. It may take a walk down a dark alley to see clearly. Embrace your follies, 
feel gratitude for getting past the worst episodes and eventually 
finding your way along a less-cluttered path."
Noodle that a moment:  
eventually finding your way along a less cluttered path.  
In the words of the great Sally Brown:
I LIKE IT- and that's my new philosophy!

Source: via Debbie on Pinterest

Saturday, April 21, 2012

It Happened at the World's Fair

Another 50th anniversary:  The Seattle World's Fair!  Where will it be next?  New York... Chicago... Paris...Knoxville... New Orleans... San Francisco... London... Montreal... (Is it my imagination, or did the U.S. have an unfair advantage?)  When Seattle was announced, the whole Northwest went crazy!  TV commercials beckoned us to Pack up your troubles and head to the FAIR!  Dad didn't want to take us... he didn't do well with crowds - always surrounded by autograph mongers... but people weren't going to the World's Fair to see Addie Bobkins... they were going to see the Space Needle!!  America's version of the Eiffel Tower!  And the Monorail... and maybe, just maybe we could catch a glimpse of King Elvis just hanging out eating an ice cream cone between takes...
Elvis Presley at the Seattle's World Fair
Because dad was a disc jockey, I was the first on the block to croon Good Luck Charm - couldn't he pull some strings and get me a part on this movie?
Please Elvis, pick me!
Elvis Presley in It Happened at the Worlds Fair

Of course some people actually went to the futuristic exhibits to see what we now so casually call SKYPE!
But back then... sheesh... we didn't even have push button dialing yet.
I still remember my first phone number ALPINE 2-0694
and I even remember my grandmother's - she had the best - ATLANTIC 1-4646

We finally made it to the top of the Space Needle... nobody even recognized dad.
I think he was sad about that.
As we drive up the I-5 on our way to visit family up and down it's corridor,
the Space Needle stands proudly above the Seattle Skyline... 
One day on our travels to the north, we will stop at the Seattle Center... 
Unfortunately, along with Menopause came a lovely fear of heights,
so I will enjoy that Space Needle from the ground, thank you very much.
I wonder if the roller coaster is still there?  
Maybe we can catch a glimpse of Elvis... I could happen!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

The Day the Music Died...

The man who was in our living rooms in one form or another for decades.
We teased him as he grew older (you can tease friends) wondering if he would ever give up...
Now he's gone...

Great Video Story about him

With Dick Clark... what we saw, was what we got.
He never seemed to want center stage, rather content to remain in the background,
interviewing those who sought the position of glory, avoiding offense.
He had an approachable, big-brother type of personality...
a "low-key ringmaster in the rock 'n' roll circus"
(from The Man Who Made Rock 'n Roll Safe for America)

He was quiet and calm...

1957 Time Capsule

From American Bandstand we learned the latest styles and dance moves...
and we came running when we heard the familiar theme song (no pause button back then)!
Bandstand Boogie

I wish I could have met him - they say he was truly a CLASS ACT.
One friend, Rich Patterson, took a chance and wrote a letter to his idol,
asking if he could meet him while he was in town.
Never expecting a response, he was blown away when the ringmaster himself wrote back:

Rich met him... toured his home... took pictures... solidifying what I'd heard.
Truly a pro... yet grounded in reality.
He cared about people, and made everyone who came in contact, feel special!
What a difference an hour can make...
Dick Clark and Rich Patterson

Heaven help us as we watch Ryan Seacrest try to fill Mr Clark's shoes...
Ryan Seacrest and Dick Clark
But who knows what went on between the two of them.
Maybe our "big brother" willingly handed him the baton.
Maybe Ryan will take tips from the pro and calm down... quit seeking the spotlight...
50 years from now, I suppose our children will be mourning the passing of their own legend...

But for now... Dick Clark... so long... 

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Someone told me it's all happening at the zoo...

Happy 50th Birthday to the baby elephant we all grew to love... 
The Portland Zoo was already the coolest... but now we had a new baby boy!
At that point in time, he was the first elephant to be born in the Western hemisphere in 44 years!
The city went crazy with excitement!

 Every kid had a Cool Zoo Key and we prided ourselves in knowing all the words to the jingle...

Baby Elephant Walk was Addie Bobkins' theme song, and he was invited to broadcast live from their zoo home!  He got a little too close to the new baby, and Mother Belle whacked him in the jaw - live on the air!  It clicked for the rest of his life... Wish I had a photo of that...

Everywhere, Packy was the topic of conversation.  This was a HUGE event in our lives... 
Wish I could be there for the party...
Something tells me it's all happening at the zoo!
I don't know enough to comment on the plight of the elephants in zoos, but I have been assured that the Portland Elephant Family has been treated with kindness and positive reinforcement. 
Packy doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do.
That's good to know.

Sunday, April 08, 2012

Happy Easter!

Easter... a time for renewals... a time for reflection... a time for family... I didn't realize how many stores were closed today.  That impresses me.
1958 - my little brother is still in the incubator...

Our family didn't go to church today... but that's OK.  When I was little, we regularly attended church, but Easter was special:  new Gloves... new hats... new dress (which she made of course).  On Easter Sunday I was allowed to sit with my parents, instead of attending Sunday School with the other kids.  I LOVED that.  Sitting next to my mother as she sang in her high soprano voice... "Glory Be to the Father... and to the Son and to the Holy Ghost... as it was in the Beginning, is now and ever Shall Be!"  And my father with his deep voice belting out on the other side of me... I felt safe in my Methodist Pew... between the people I loved the most.

A typical GG table...
eclectic candles and anything purple...
Thought a lot about mom today... and the Easter Brunches that she loved to give...  and her hats... she loved any occasion to wear a hat and have a dinner party.

My husband barbeques Ribeyes (YUM)... but it's not the same as going to mom's house... playing croquet... nibbling on deviled eggs... sipping wine... gabbing and gabbing until leaving with a full tummy and happy heart... and although she is no longer with us physically, I feel her around me today...

I love my girls... they have a crazy mom who can't cook and never wears hats.  But we have created our own way of celebrating holidays... 
We are together... we love each other... 
and that's what really matters, right?

Never underestimate the value of a sister!

Sunday, April 01, 2012

April Fools - Church in Bed!

My granddaughter giggled when I told her we were having "CHURCH IN BED" 
Nope... it's true... we are snuggling and watching CONFERENCE!

This is my absolute favorite time of year - General Conference - the first Sunday in October and April - when the Prophet and Apostles speak to us directly from Salt Lake via television, radio, satellite.  With breakfast and journal on my lap, I am ready to snuggle in and indulge myself for the next few hours... to feel that "whenever two or more of you are gathered" feeling... even over the TV/Internet airwaves I feel it... and nothing compares.  Watching it live, along with millions around the globe...We bow our heads in prayer... then the Tabernacle Choir sings.  I don't always care for choir music... but there is something about it at conference time.  Maybe it's the spirit I feel, combined with the angelic voices, that carries me to a new realm, readying my mind for the words I will hear... softening my heart to leave behind  worries and worldly craziness... so it can gently embrace new thoughts... new ways of looking at things... new ways to LOVE ONE ANOTHER...

I am spiritually FED by many... but usually one talk will stand out in my heart.
This time, it was Elder Dieter Uchkdorf (Who loves him - raise your hand!)
He gave a powerful message based on two simple words:
Forgive others (everyone)... rid your heart of bitterness... STOP judging...
Do I envy someone?  STOP IT!  Do I hold a grudge?  STOP IT!   
It is an old message with a new twist... 
It is easy to love those who love us, but how about that nasty neighbor?
A talented techie already put it into poster format:

I relish the words I heard today... and pray I can let go of old wounds...
forgive those who trespass against me,

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...